We often talk about how the only person who we should focus on validating us is ourselves, but rarely explain how to actually do that. Validating your own emotions is coming to a place of accepting them. Where you notice what your emotions are and you never judge yourself for having them. This self-validation can be really healing for you emotional wellbeing.
Be Mindful
In order to validate your emotions, you first need to understand what they are, why you feel that way, and rally just accept them. You will see mindfulness mentioned a lot when it comes to emotional wellbeing because of how valuable it is for your mindset and how you process your emotions.
When you are mindful, you are present in yourself and in your thoughts and feelings. You aren’t judging how you feel, but you are accepting of it, and that alone is validating your own emotions. It can be an important part of changing how you view yourself and what emotions you experience during different moments of your life.
Never Judge How You Feel
Just like when you validate someone else, you don’t want to place judgment on your own emotions. This can be hard sometimes when you feel like they are being intrusive on your mind or your life, but it is really important to find a place of acceptance without criticism.
Any time you experience an emotion or feeling that makes you uncomfortable or that you don’t want, give yourself a couple minutes to just think about it. Ask yourself why you feel that way, what triggered that emotion, if you have felt that way before, and what you did previously to cope with this emotion.
By doing this exercise, you learn how to acknowledge your emotions for what they are and validate them, instead of placing judgment.
Encourage Yourself
You don’t need validate or encouragement from others! You are the best person to encourage and motivate yourself. You can be your own best friend, your cheerleader, the one who gives you unconditional love and support. Continue encouraging yourself and showing yourself how much you can accomplish.
Think of all your challenging experiences before now, and how you overcame them. Get honest with yourself about how strong and powerful you are, and how much you can actually overcome in your life. This alone should prove that you deserve to encourage and support yourself every step of the way.
Accept Your Emotions
Accepting your emotions or how you feel is not the same thing as wanting to continue feeling that way. It is simply you being in a state of acknowledgement that it’s how you feel right now, and the understanding that it’s temporary.
People often feel that acceptance is the same thing as forgiving and forgetting, but it’s not. It is closely tied with being mindful and understanding your emotions, so that you can come to a place of recognition and know that soon they will pass.
Use Positive Self-Talk
Stop talking bad about yourself, even in your own thoughts. Your internal dialogue is running constantly all day and night, and you might notice that it is often negative when thinking about yourself. Whenever you have a moment to yourself, think about where your thoughts go.
What is the dialogue in your had? What are you thinking about yourself? When you have those internal conversations with other people, what scenario are you seeing? What is that person saying about you? What are you saying about yourself?
Try to shift these to more positive thoughts. One at a time, begin acknowledging when you talk badly abut yourself, and then shift it to say something positive about yourself. The more you do it, the easier it becomes.